Yana, good afternoon!

My letter is based on this letter here, which was from a girl with a strong sensitivity to sounds, light and smells.

Noise has always bothered me quite a lot - it’s very difficult for me to concentrate when there is noise nearby, especially “meaningful” noise interferes - conversations or when someone is talking on the phone, chatting on a talk show on TV, songs in Russian. Also, I cannot fall asleep when it is noisy, and I wake up if there are some loud sounds. I don't like "background" noise, I don't have a TV, I turn on the radio or music only when I want to listen to the radio or music, otherwise I prefer to spend time in silence (I live alone). This is the preface.

A few years ago, after I graduated from college, my parents bought me an apartment in a newly built house. We did some renovations and I moved there. And it quickly became clear that the house was built of shit and cardboard - you can literally hear EVERYTHING that happens with the neighbors (later I talked to construction specialists who knew how this house was built, and they told me that the internal floors in the house were made on a very cheap and, as a result, very poor technology.) From time to time, the noise from the neighbors interfered, but it was tolerable. Until a few months ago, new neighbors moved into the apartment above me, and then my life just turned into hell.

No, not some drug addicts, alcoholics with night brawls, not party-goers, music lovers with loud music settled there. An ordinary family with a child - the child is not a baby, just a small one. But they keep making noise. They talk loudly - so that you can almost make out the words, the child rushes around the apartment with a loud stomp and deafening screams, and throws toys on the floor, something falls all the time, furniture moves, they quite often gather companies with friends and children, and then the children wear and yell in a crowd. All this continues until late in the evening. It is impossible to have a quiet evening at home after work. After several times there was such a situation - I go to bed, fall asleep, something falls with a roar at the neighbors, I wake up, somehow fall asleep again, a child rushes from above with screams and clatter, I wake up again, and after that already I can’t fall asleep half the night - I just stopped sleeping normally. I’ve already failed an important exam twice because I didn’t get enough sleep the night before because of the noise and barely thought, and I can barely work because I don’t get enough sleep all the time. I already just hate these creatures.

That is, my cuckoo hasn’t quite gone yet, and I understand that people don’t make noise on purpose to ruin my life, they just live like this - loudly, and this is such an unfortunate coincidence that the house is so badly built. But that doesn't help with the fact that my quality of life has gotten so much worse because of it.

I talked to the neighbors about the noise, got answers: “Achotakova?” and "until 11 pm we have the right." Well, yes, they really do. When they were noisy at three in the morning, I wrote a statement to the district police officer, he seemed to have talked to them, although I don’t know for sure - but I don’t even know if they were even fined. At some point, I freaked out, took out a loan, soundproofed the ceiling in the room. But it didn't help much, it muffled the conversations a little, but did nothing with the clatter and rumble, plus the noise is not muffled in the rest of the apartment, and it comes into the room too.

I can’t focus on anything when I’m at home, I can’t read or study something, because I sit all in tension, waiting for the noise to start (even when it’s quiet), and when the noise is heard, then hatred pours over me , and I think: “May you die, creatures!”. Going to bed is now a difficult problem - plugging your ears with earplugs (and it’s uncomfortable with earplugs, and it’s generally painful to sleep with some, I’ve already tried a lot of them), turn on “white noise” to somehow muffle the sounds from the neighbors, and then I or two I'll just lie there, unable to sleep.

I myself understand that this is a bad situation. I even thought about selling this apartment and buying another one. In general, if the situation is quite extreme, then why not. But there are many problems here. To buy an apartment in a newly built house is to get a “bare” concrete box without everything, and another million or at least half a million will need to be invested in repairs, and for the next five years all the neighbors will be doing repairs in such a house, with all the hammers and perforators due, and silence can also be forgotten. To buy a "secondary" - you still have to redo the repair, somehow you don't want to live in someone else's. To buy a house so that there are no neighbors at all, neither from above, nor from below, nor from the side - but it is very expensive, there will not be enough money for a house from the sale of an apartment. And with all this, it’s a pity to sell your apartment, you look back at all these lovingly selected tiles, lamps that I have been looking for for so long, at all sorts of native little things - and it’s a pity to throw it all to tears. In addition, there is another moment. I think that in a situation like mine, when you think badly from stress and emotions, it’s better not to take on such serious things and deals - it’s easy to run into scammers, not paying attention to some important point, doing something stupid is dangerous, all in all.

On the other hand, I also understand that this noise from the neighbors, which for me is such big problem, someone else could simply not pay any attention, live peacefully and sleep peacefully. I read your posts with envy, Yana, when you write that your cats jump at night, and you hear everything, but at the same time it does not prevent you from sleeping. Well, let's say if my cat was mad at night, it would bother me, but when he runs around like a heffalump during the day, it doesn't cause me any irritation, because it's "his" noise - and not the noise from strangers, which I have to listen to forced, because there is nowhere to go.

In the reply to the letter I mentioned at the beginning, you write that it is possible to "teach" the brain to "not hear" certain noises. That this can be learned if you consciously do it. I think that in general it would be useful for me in general - it is far from always quiet at work, and sometimes you have to sleep on planes, trains or hostels, where the silence is far from perfect, in general, there are many situations where such a skill could come in handy . But I live in the province. We have never heard of any schools of neurofeedback here, there are no good psychotherapists, and I don’t even have money for classes with a psychotherapist via Skype. How to approach to solve this problem on my own - I still can not even imagine.

I would really like you to say your view on this situation, well, and maybe suggest something, because you, Yana, always have a very sensible view of things. Sorry this letter is so long.

Sincerely, N.

Hello!
Yes, of course, I am for learning to live next to the noise, and not suffer from it. Especially considering that the noise surrounds you, it's a fact, but it's harmless enough. Those. yes, small children can actually jump around like elephants. But Small child, as you yourself said, this is not a crowd of drug addicts. And they will meet you everywhere. It is very difficult to live if every sound disturbs you. Somewhere there will be children, and somewhere - a tram under the window, a city, a road, an old house with sounds. Earplugs and nerves will not be enough.

Accordingly, yes, we must somehow unlearn to hear it.

The most important thing is that I know for sure that it is possible!!!
I am not a neurologist, I do not know how to do it consciously. But I know that the body has such a mechanism, and in many situations it turns on very well.

For example, among others, tram rails run parallel to our house, and every 10 minutes a tram passes in both directions. I don't really hear it, but my mom has these rails right under her window. She has not heard anything of this for a long time, even in summer, when she sleeps with open door to the balcony.

I also know people who live very close to the airport, and have long ceased to hear planes flying past the window. And the trains are not heard by people living near the railway station. Do you remember how many times I wrote tragic articles about how people "sniff" something? And they don’t feel, for example, that their house smells like cats, or mice, or some kind of rotten stuff. Or that they themselves smell. And you have to leave the house for a very long time so that the scent is renewed, "and began to feel this smell again.
I once read an explanation for this phenomenon. Allegedly, we are accustomed to reacting to what is naturally stitched into us as a "danger". For example, it smells rotten, this is an important signal, because rotten food can be poisonous. And when the brain registers that this particular rotten stuff smells constantly, but no one is poisoned, it turns off the reaction to this "dangerous signal" so as not to be nervous again.

It seems to me that the solution to your problem is somewhere in this. You yourself wrote that if your cats were running around, it would be "your own" noise, and you would react to it differently. Accordingly, here is your task: try to teach your brain that the neighbors are also "their" noise.

In fact, I do not react to the usual stomping of cats, because I am used to the fact that nothing bad follows from this. They run about the same route, and after a certain number of laps they calm down. And I know that it happens every time, after which everyone falls asleep. So nothing in me pays attention to it.

I mean, if my cats suddenly make some unusual sound, I really wake up !!! Moreover, I wake up and jump up, even if the sound is quite quiet, sometimes it's just a rustle, or something like that. But this is unfamiliar - it is not clear what is falling there, and on whom, and where. So anxiety kicks in. I don't notice the usual. Those. the secret here is to somehow persuade your brain not to pay attention to sounds that you already know everything about.

In general, I read all sorts of books here about the work of the brain, and they often say that the brain (oh, miracle!) Completely understands human language! This means that some things can literally be said to him! And he will understand! That's right in such words as we say, he will understand. There are only a few minor nuances. For example, that the brain allegedly does not perceive the word "not". Therefore, the brain does not need to be told "if only not to get sick", this can be understood exactly the opposite. And you have to tell him "I'm afraid to get sick" or "I really want to be healthy", something like that. And in general, appeals to the brain should be formulated briefly, simply and unambiguously. Taking into account the fact that he is a very lazy brute, and on every occasion he is dumb, out of laziness.

However, you can try talking to him! Comfort him (and yourself). Tell him "These are not dangerous sounds. This is all falling in someone else's apartment. This is all happening outside my house. This is all safe for me. I am safe in my apartment, I feel comfortable and good here!"
You can even persuade yourself that your favorite apartment is your fortress, and in general is the best remedy out of fear. After all, you yourself wrote how you love her, how you lovingly selected everything for her. So remind yourself how good it is for you here. Tell yourself something about your apartment - that the walls at home help. That at home you are brave and calm. (Only without the "not", do you remember?) :-))

Honestly, I would try to literally persuade myself with words at home that you feel good there, there is no danger, and there is nothing to be nervous about.

Moreover, try to say something positive about the noises you hear. There's only a child up there! This is the joy, in fact, that it is not an alcoholic, not a psycho and not a pack of drug addicts. And the child, so alive, cheerful. It means healthy. Soon he will grow up and will jump less. By the way, if you forget about everything, you will not even notice how 10 years will pass in this apartment. And if you and your neighbors live together, maybe they will live happily over you for another hundred years. And they will not be replaced by any much more terrible. And there are not thieves, not bandits, but just some young parents. In short, tell your head all the best about what you hear. And - that it does not pose any danger.

Because we pay attention to something precisely because of this. Because our body sees some kind of danger in this, and is worried.

You can also try to work with your anxiety globally. Psychotherapists say that if you dig up the cause of some kind of injury, it often cures it by a large percentage! And they write about this hypersensitivity to sounds that most often the reason there is generally banal - once in childhood they were frightened by very loud sounds. Something unexpectedly rumbled nearby, slammed a cracker, yelled in the ear. The man got scared and injured. Or maybe someone was yelling and making noise. when threatened to punish? Or did some sounds, maybe even not very loud, precede some traumatic event? For example, this is how the neighbors jump behind the wall - something behind your wall rumbled muffledly, and then you found out that someone fell, got hurt, or maybe even died? Or maybe someone once frightened (or frightened) you with some kind of horror that creeps up, and at first it is only audible?

Or vice versa - maybe, for example, they offended you at school, sneaked up from behind, and did something bad to you. And you could not hear about the approach of danger in advance, because it was noisy around? And now you listen personally to every rustle?

Try to delve into your memory - maybe you will find some such events in the past? If it works, then it's easy. Do you have logical thinking. (And fears are very well treated with logic.) You can talk to yourself about the fact that no one else is sneaking up on you now. And no one offends you, and no one yells at you, and does not make noise, and does not go from banging on the table to throwing furniture and people. Or what scared you there - it is no longer dangerous for you, or it is not at all anymore in your life. Maybe this will help?

And yet - it's good when you yourself are not sitting in complete silence. And it is not necessary to jam something with "white noise". Turn on something interesting. There is such a trick - there are many activities that can be combined with listening to audiobooks or watching TV shows. At the same time, it is often the series that you can not watch, because there you quickly figure out who is who, and then it’s enough to listen to the dialogues. But you need to find yourself something that you like and are interested in. For example, where you like dialogues. And now turn on this series or book - not very loudly. Don't try to yell at your neighbors. And to make it so that it was audible, but it was necessary with some effort to listen to what was happening there. Then "all your ears will go there", i.e. the rest will be overlooked.

In the evening, when everything becomes quieter, you need to do everything that you have turned on, quieter. (Most people instinctively do this anyway, because the general background is reduced, and the person himself does not want to disturb anyone, and loud sounds seem even louder to him.) So by nighttime, maybe something will be playing quite quietly . And many experts n sleep in recent times They write that it’s not at all shameful to fall asleep under this at all. If you are calmer with such a "buhtelka" under your ear.

Sometimes, by the way, sounds can be "drowned out" not only by sounds. For example, some people hear better in the dark. (Because there are no other irritants.) Try leaving a dim lamp on, which doesn't really interfere with sleep. Maybe due to it, audibility will decrease (because there are other experiences that occupy the reserves of the brain). Or maybe (again) you find out that everything is somehow very scary for you in complete darkness. So sleep in incomplete darkness until the nervous system calms down and learns to sleep soundly and deafly.

I have no more ideas yet, how to calm the agitated brain, and distract it from what it hears too carefully. It would be great if these thoughts of mine could help you somehow. And it would be even better if readers could find more tips!
And you, if you somehow cope with this problem - share with us? Because I think that you are not alone, and there are many who would like to stop hearing the world around so much.

How not to be distracted while reading is probably of interest to all readers. Everyone at least once was distracted from reading a book. Everything is natural, if interest in a case is lost, then the human brain switches to other things. In order to maintain concentration while reading, you should perform concentration exercises.

Exercise 1:

Imagine what happens if you don't read the right book. Present the picture in negative tones. Now imagine what happens after you read the book. How the world will be a better place.

Exercise 2:

Clear your mind of debris. Enter the state of not thinking.

How not to be distracted while reading - the fight against noise

Reading productivity is greatly affected by external noise. External noises, both single and continuous, have a very large negative impact on reading productivity. It will no longer be just about lowering the level of attention when reading, as it was above, but about switching attention from text to another object.

Very often external noises distract from reading: they annoy or, on the contrary, carry away to such an extent that the book is sometimes put aside. We take special pleasure in diverting our attention from a book (and are ready to do so at the slightest opportunity) if we do not like the material we are working on. Constantly being distracted by external noises, the reader gets used to working with relaxed attention, cultivating inattention in himself.

External noise factor and its influence on text memorization

The factor of external noise while working with a book is objective (after all, we cannot change, for example, the noise conditions in the reading room), but also subjective at the same time: you can change yourself by learning not to react to noise as a hindrance when reading. In order to “not listen to noises”, you need to learn not to evaluate the noises that you hear, not to process them.

If noise behind the wall distracts you from reading, you can no longer concentrate and put the book aside. Try to turn on the TV, and it will distract you from the noises that have recently interfered, your irritation will be replaced by a pleasant state. You will forget about the noise that irritated you, get distracted from it, and even turning off the TV, you will not pay attention to the noise for some time, although it will continue. You can hear the noise, but not listen to it. Thus, the unpleasant was replaced by the pleasant. The temporary diversion of attention protected you from exposure to noise.

How to turn off external stimuli while reading books

One of the ways to switch off from extraneous noises, learn not to react to them while reading, is the tennis ball method, developed at the School of Rational Reading.

This method is based on the principle of double switching of attention. The tennis ball method, as practice shows, is universal: almost everyone who used it learns to be distracted from external noises and stop listening to them. If the reader has trained himself to automatism using the tennis ball method, then the fight against noise will be carried out already at a subconscious level, without distracting consciousness from understanding the content. readable text. It takes 1-3 seconds for such a reader to get rid of annoying noise while reading. After that, all attention is again focused on reading.

Fast reading. How not to get distracted while reading To get a better understanding of the technique of speed reading, sign up for face-to-face courses, however, you can learn how to speed read on your own. Improve your reading technique and you'll spend less time researching documents. Follow the tips and you will increase your productivity. Types of reading Super slow reading. A detailed study of the document is pursued - for example, the study of legal documents. Slow reading - for example, a work of art. Pre-reading. When you need to get an idea of ​​what you read Speed ​​reading. How to scroll text in speed reading mode By acting in accordance with this scheme, you will reduce the time it takes to find the information you need. Read the introduction carefully. Look through the chapters that interest you from the fifth to the tenth. Pay attention to the examples and highlights in the text. Review the passages of text that you found important. Read the subject index. Understand the thesaurus and concepts covered in the book. Think about how the content of the book is similar to the content of previously studied documents. Write a review on the text or a letter to the author. Read the author's examples. How many examples are repeated? Does it appear that the author of the text borrowed the content of the document Review the introduction to each chapter, read the last page of each chapter. Read the title. Make up general idea about the content of the book before reading it. If you are studying a reference text, then you need to study selected places. Therefore, the described reading strategy is very useful. How to read documents and articles First, you should look at the places in the text where the conclusions are indicated. And then read the document. In this case, the essence of the article will be clear from the first paragraph. Study the presentation of the text, the overview, the first few paragraphs, the introductory part. Study the conclusion or a few final paragraphs. Study carefully the places that seemed to you the most important. Scanning reading. Using the subconscious mind while reading. When a person reads quickly, he understands not individual words, but phrases at once. scan the page with a diagonal eye movement. As soon as you feel that you have found something interesting, then move on to regular reading. Field notes. Take notes while reading. Write questions to the author of the text. You are not wasting time. Thanks to the notes and formulated questions, the studied text is fixed in the mind. If the document and new information is thought out, then it is not required to return to it anymore. In the process of reading a book, mark important places with a marker, underline key words. Look for Alternatives to Reading

"TENNIS BALL" method

One of the most common obstacles to in-depth reading is external noise. The conversation of neighbors in the reading room, the crying of a child in the train, the sound of a working TV behind the wall makes it difficult to immerse yourself in the meaning of what you are reading, especially if you have to read something necessary, but not very interesting. As a rule, attempts to ignore external noise are not only unsuccessful, but, on the contrary, lead to the fact that after a long struggle with noise, the reader begins to analyze what is heard, distracting from reading. ("They talk about illnesses all the time, as if there is nothing else to talk about!", "Why do parents not pay attention to a crying child!" etc.). Gradually, the reader's irritation grows, and he already has to cope with his own condition.

Exists effective method combating such interference with reading is the "tennis ball" method.

The "tennis ball" method is based on the use of certain processes occurring in the human brain.

One can imagine the human brain as a platform on which bonfires are burning - foci of excitation caused by the analysis of various information that simultaneously enters the brain: the reader comprehends the content of the paragraph - this is a big fire (comprehension is given most of the attention), in the room where reading takes place, hot - this is the second fire, but small, because. so little attention is paid to the perception of this that the reader almost does not feel the increased temperature. As dinner time approaches, another bonfire, associated with the feeling of hunger, appears and flares up more and more, and so on. Such small bonfires (small parts of attention) light up from all sensations and thoughts associated with clothing, footwear, comfortable posture, lighting, physical or mental fatigue, etc. the desire to concentrate, nevertheless switches attention to noise, being distracted from reading. So at the moment, the main focus is switched from text comprehension to noise as the main focus of brain excitation. In this case, the following conditions are met:

1. The more actively thought processes proceed, the greater is the total amount of parts of attention devoted to the simultaneous analysis of all stimuli (external and internal), i.e. topics more number bonfires.
2. An increase in attention to some stimuli is accompanied by a decrease in attention to others (some kindling fires take the energy and fire of others, reducing them).
3. That part of attention grows (that fire flares up), which is directed to the actual event at the moment. For example, if while reading you remember that now there is a program on TV that you definitely wanted to watch, then the success of further reading will depend on what you consider more important (relevant) at the moment.

Therefore, if a small fire (corresponding in magnitude to irritation due to interfering noise) appears on a site with a large fire (caused by reading comprehension), and this fire is not extinguished, then it may flare up, absorbing energy from a large fire, and even can extinguish a large fire.To prevent this from happening, the "tennis ball" method is used.

The essence of the method is as follows: having caught himself on the fact that he involuntarily begins to listen to an external stimulus, the reader mentally:

1. He puts a spacesuit on his head;
2. Imagines audible noise in the form of tennis balls flying from noise sources;
3. Imagines the bouncing of balls hitting the spacesuit and hears the sound of clatter from the blows.

All this must be done while reading, without ceasing to comprehend the content of the text. As a result, part of the attention gradually switches from an external stimulus (noise) to tennis balls, and then to comprehension of what is being read, i.e. there is a double switch of attention. As soon as you begin to train, guided by this method, in the very first stages of work you will feel positive changes.

The "tennis ball" method (BTS) works as follows: with the appearance of a small but dangerous fire (i.e., as soon as distraction from reading by external noise begins), the reader artificially creates a new and sufficiently large fire caused by the tennis balls bouncing off the spacesuit ( i.e. considerable attention begins to be paid to the suggestion of the idea of ​​a spacesuit and the balls bouncing off it, as well as the suggestion that the reader hears the sound of their clatter). As a result of the relevance of this process at the moment, a new fire begins to grow due to the pumping of energy from other fires. This leads to a decrease and then attenuation of the fire, corresponding to external noise.

And at the same time, the fire corresponding to the comprehension of what is being read will decrease, which is undesirable, but forced. After adjusting the strength of the fires for some time, the reader consciously focuses on the process of reading (i.e., begins to inflate the fire, corresponding to the assimilation of what is being read, at the expense of the fire, corresponding to the ideas of the spacesuit and the ball). Thus, after some time, attention shifts more and more to comprehension of what is read and less and less remains on tennis balls, and even more so on external noise.

Thus, although the regulation of foci of excitation occurs in the brain at the subconscious level, nevertheless, through training, practicing certain exercises, you can achieve switching the main attention to the object you need.

The "tennis ball" method allows you to:

1. Switch attention from the main stimulus to worked out ideas until the comprehension of the stimulus stops.
2. To transfer the attention focused on these representations to the main work:

To use the ITS, you must first work out the ability to quickly and easily call:

1. Sensation of spacesuit around head;
2. Representation of tennis balls flying towards the spacesuit from a noise source;
3. Representation of balls hitting and bouncing off the spacesuit;
4. Perception of the sound of the clatter of balls hitting the spacesuit.

This can be learned step by step as follows:

I stage

Learn to quickly evoke and sustain the feeling of a spacesuit around your head by repeatedly imagining that spacesuit in your mind. The suit or shell can be of any color, size and shape, choose for yourself what you like best, but there are two indispensable conditions: it must be transparent and light.

II stage

Learn to imagine tennis balls flying from a source of noise and dissolving in your head. Balls should be light, any color and small in size. They must fly slowly. As soon as one ball, having reached the head, dissolves in it, another ball immediately flies out of the noise source. (For example, if readers at the next table disturb you with their conversations, then you need to imagine balls flying out of the place where these people are sitting). Where and how exactly these balls are born does not matter. The balls should fly out regardless of the volume of the noise and its frequency (for example, if the creak of the door interferes with you, then as soon as the next one is heard, you immediately imagine a ball flying from the door. After the ball dissolves in your head, you imagine the next ball flying from the same place, regardless of whether the door is currently creaking or not).

Stage III

Connect the two previous representations and add auditory sensations. you need to imagine the spacesuit and the balls flying out of the noise source, reaching the spacesuit and bouncing off it, and at the same time hear a clear clatter from the imaginary impact of the ball on the spacesuit. Next, follow the bouncing ball until it disappears at infinity and also imagine the flight of the next ball, etc.

You can not force the first balls to bounce, but pass them through the spacesuit and, only starting, for example, from the fifth, imagine their bouncing.

The first and second stages can be mastered alternately within two weeks. And only after you learn to clearly imagine the spacesuit and the balls separately, you can start combining them and train for another two weeks.

There are, of course, such readers who can work fruitfully even with any noise. Some of them even believe that it is better to read with music or with the radio or TV turned on.

Experts, based on experimental data, believe that everyone should work in the conditions to which he is accustomed. But still, in order to achieve the greatest productivity of mental labor, they advise creating silence, but not absolute, but relative. A slight hum, the rustling of pages in the reading room (of course, in the absence of chatter at the next table) contributes to the best assimilation of the text. It is shown that it is more difficult to maintain attention in complete silence than with weak monotonous noise.

The ability to isolate attention from external noise may be another of your requirements for improving the culture of reading.

The ringing of the alarm clock hurts my head, my morning begins with it. The sound of a hot arrow pierces my head. You need to get up.

Who came up with these alarm clocks?

Who came up with the idea that in the morning you have to go to work or study? The climb is hard. Trying to come to my senses, I go to the kitchen. You need to prepare breakfast. I turn on the coffee grinder and toaster, put the kettle on. The coffee grinder buzzes, but, fortunately, not for long, the toast shoots out the bread.

I got rid of the kettle with a whistle a long time ago, although the whistle was still useful. All household appliances seem to be invented in order to harass with their noise, the rumble and rumble emitted by it cause irritation and anger.

The city is gradually waking up and the range of sounds coming from the street is getting wider. An agonizing day ahead. The commute to work becomes a challenge. The noise of cars passing by, the sharp sounds of horns, the howl of sirens, the sickeningly loud conversations of passers-by. I just want to plug my ears, run away away, where there are no these painfully cutting ear sounds. It seems that there is no hiding from the noise, no hiding.

Where are my headphones?

Only in them and salvation from intrusive noise from the outside. Noises in the workplace have a different character - the monotonous continuous hum of a computer, an air conditioning system, and many other vague but painful sounds. The ticking of the clock brings some discomfort to the working environment. But in spite of everything, the working day ends and the evening approaches.

Evening is a foretaste of silence. Silence is my salvation, the salvation of my ears and my tired head during the day. The degree of sound tension gradually subsides, the world around calms down. The much-needed and much-needed peace is coming.

Why do loud noises annoy me so much?

Can't I calmly react and not pay attention to extraneous sounds like other people?

For a long time I tried to understand why exactly I perceive the noise of the world around me so painfully. Why have headphones become a daily necessity?

What is wrong with me?

In an attempt to get rid of the problem, mountains of literature were re-read, but in vain. Consultations with psychologists and following their advice did not bring any result. There are a lot of tips, but there is no solution to the problem and no real help.

Trying to get used to it, listening to calm music, remembering something from my childhood, changing the environment, reading mantras, calming down - I failed.

My every day was like a sound hell until the moment I got acquainted with the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan.

Hidden in the unconscious

According to systems-vector psychology Yuri Burlan, people who experience severe discomfort and irritation from the sound background, who have hypersensitivity to sounds — the owners of the sound vector.

The sound vector sets its owner special properties of the psyche. By nature, they are endowed with perfect hearing and are very sensitive to any noise. Sound engineers are given by nature the ability to the highest degree concentration and abstract intellect, capable of generating new ideas, knowing the hidden.

In silence, it is easier for them to concentrate, but for a person with realized properties of the sound vector, noise is by no means a hindrance. All brilliant composers are carriers of the sound vector.

But with incomplete implementation, the sound vector manifests itself negatively, including painful hearing. Often these are the unconscious consequences of childhood psychotrauma and psychosexual developmental delays.

"Silence mode" is necessary from birth, this is the key to the successful development of a child with a sound vector. Loud screams, especially the cry of a mother, have a traumatic effect on the psyche of any baby. And the supersensitive hearing of the soundman is inflicted with unbearable pain. Sounds outside become a constant source of suffering. It is from this pain that they hide behind the headphones.

Exit from negative states perhaps by realizing its nature with the help of systems thinking. A sound engineer is entrusted by nature with a global task - to realize the hidden. Realizing his innate properties, a person with a sound vector is included in a completely different relationship with the outside world, along with all its noise.
Understand why this happens, find the reasons for your reactions to the world and, finally, you can get rid of discomfort at the introductory free online lectures on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Register and enjoy the sounds of the world around you.

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Staying calm and focused is not easy. Crowds of people, cars, noisy streets, shops crowded with people, loud conversations, obsessive thoughts, problems, anxieties… This not only interferes with maintaining mental and mental balance, but also causes negative emotions. What to do in order not to let negative experiences into our minds and keep our concentration on what is important to us? The best way would be to abstract from everything that interferes with our peace and annoys.

But what does it mean to abstract? How to abstract? What benefit can this bring? What could be wrong with not being able to do this? We will try to answer these questions in the article.

Abstraction: what is it and why is it needed?

The term "abstraction" comes from the Latin word "abstractio" and means "distraction". distraction is most often understood not as a change in activity, as one might think, but a change in thinking. The bottom line is that, by abstracting, a person begins to look at things from a new perspective.

The human brain is used to perceiving everything (phenomena, events, people, situations, etc.), generalizing its ideas about what it perceives, without dividing them into separate elements. And if we answer the question "What does it mean to abstract?" precisely in a psychological context, this means mentally moving away from what is happening in order to enable your nervous system relax and recover in order to get rid of the negative influence of irritating factors, analyze the situation and look at it impartially.

You can abstract from sounds (from noise), from negative experiences, from emotions, and even from the outside world. And this can be learned, and for this you do not need to make any titanic efforts.

The ability to abstract helps in many ways. life situations, in particular, when it is necessary to get certain thoughts out of your head, move away from surging emotions, discard the unnecessary, understand the essence of a problem or situation. We can be stressed by the behavior of another person or - a classic of the genre - the noise of a neighbor's drill on a sweet Saturday morning; we may resent events at work or somewhere on the street. Giving in to our feelings, we easily forget about the main thing, lose sight of something important, lose motivation. And the ability to mentally discard all the husks helps us to remain in ourselves and ourselves.

With the help of the skill of abstraction, everyone can better determine their desires and goals and find ways to achieve them, understand what they need at the current moment in time and in life in general, effectively get rid of distractions and negativity, improve intellectual activity and even speed it up.

We think that it would not be superfluous to say about what the inability to abstract can lead to. First of all, it is depression associated with a constant feeling of anxiety and fear caused by problems and stress. It is also stress itself. It tends to accumulate, and if a person does not know how to give his psyche a rest, the load on it seriously increases. This depletes energy reserves on both the physical and mental levels.

As you yourself have already perfectly understood, the ability to abstract is a powerful defense mechanism. But, of course, it is also effective remedy in the fight against distraction, procrastination, lack of time, low life and professional results. And here's another little explanation of what abstraction is, from Khan Academy.

Now let's move on to practice. And we will start with how to abstract from the manifestations of the surrounding reality in general.

How to abstract from the outside world

Anyone can learn to abstract. You yourself have already done this more than once, albeit unconsciously. Recall if there were similar situations in your life:

• Your friend tells you something, and in the meantime you think about the girl you met in the morning on the bus
• An important meeting at work, and you are in the clouds, anticipating the upcoming vacation trip
• At home, someone expresses dissatisfaction with you, and you, without paying any attention to it, read an interesting book or watch an exciting movie

You must have experienced something like this. And just this suggests that you already know how to abstract. But if earlier you did it automatically, now you can start to be distracted from the outside world on purpose, and at the moment when you need it.

The first thing you have to master in order to learn how to abstract from the negative manifestations of the outside world will be controlling your thoughts. There is a simple algorithm for this:

• Exhale
• Start slowly counting to ten
• For each count, take one slow breath in and a slow breath out.
• Concentrating on your breath, pay attention to thoughts and exhale them as if

To enhance the effect of the reception, you can look at something. For example, you are standing in line at a store, and two other customers are arguing nearby. Do the above steps and look at what is happening outside the window, look at the interior of the store, concentrate on what actions the cashier performs while serving the customer. If you can play your favorite music, do it. This breathing technique can be used in any situation.

Always remember that, abstracting from the outside world, you need to try not to succumb to emerging negative emotions. This means that any circumstances, situations, events and people should be looked at from a different angle. Here are just a few points of view:

• Perhaps you exaggerate and attach too much importance to circumstances.
• Perhaps in the current situation there is some kind of personal benefit specifically for you, and you just need to see it.
• Perhaps if everything went the way you want, you would face more serious problems.
• Perhaps you give in to the habit of reacting negatively when something goes against your expectations.

Looking at what is happening from a similar position, you can easily abstract from the outside world, and focus on positive thoughts and / or solving specific issues. In addition, you will have more energy and strength, and life will seem better and easier.

In addition to the proposed method of abstracting from the outside world, meditation can be used. It improves concentration and perfectly relaxes. It is best to meditate at home when you want to be alone with yourself, forget about everything and everyone, streamline your thoughts. But in general, you can meditate both on the street and in public transport and even at work. We talked about meditation in detail in our article "".

Activities such as walking, watching movies, meeting friends, shopping, focusing on specific activities, contemplating works of art, nature, etc. will also help to abstract from the outside world. And also, so that no one "gets" you, we recommend turning off all your gadgets from time to time.

But the manifestations of the external world are often expressed specifically in annoying noises and sounds - this is one of the most common phenomena that interfere with concentration and cause negative emotions. Next, we will tell you how to abstract from them.

How to abstract from noise and from sounds

Scientifically confirmed that every second in human brain 1 billion pulses are received. The brain, of course, can filter out a lot of unnecessary data, but about a hundred signals will still be recorded by it. And most of the information comes to us in sound form, and there is nothing surprising in the fact that noises and sounds are constantly distracting and make us “twitch”.

The following recommendations will help you learn to abstract from noise and sounds:

And another good way to learn to abstract from sounds is to master the skill of not paying attention to background noises. If you start deliberately getting used to any sounds, over time it will be easy to ignore them. Play a video while working or reading and try to focus on what you are doing. If you're getting ready for a session and your neighbor keeps hammering nails into the wall, don't run away from it—on the contrary, focus on the sound for a while and then continue learning the material.

Note that such a skill is useful to you always and everywhere, because you do not know when and where the noise will overtake you again. In addition, absolute silence can have an overwhelming effect on the psyche. If you don’t hear anything at all, you will become distracted by the absence of sounds.

Now let's move on to the most important issue - negativity, negative emotions and obsessive thoughts. If it is quite easy to abstract from the outside world and noises, then it is much more difficult to distract from what is happening inside.

How to disengage from emotions

The most important thing when distracting from emotions is to learn to abstract from the negative. Given that negative emotions often have greater momentum and power than positive ones, you first need to be able to work with them (by the way, here). There are different ways to do this, but the most effective ones include the following:

• Ignoring bad and negative thoughts
• Ignoring irritation
• Remembrance of good events
• Switching attention
• complacency
• Thoughts on gaining experience useful in the future
• Adequate perception of what is happening

We think that these methods do not need special explanations. Pay more attention to the following tips.

accept life

Try to take everything as it is. People, situations, events - all this can be different. Life cannot be called impeccable and ideal (sometimes fair), but everything that is given to us is for the good. It is impossible to control everything, you need to understand this. The sooner you do this, the calmer and easier you will become. Treat failure and negativity philosophically.

The philosophical perception of life is that, firstly, you accept the fact that white and black stripes will always alternate, and secondly, you analyze everything that happens, draw certain conclusions and just let go of what you don’t Like. This is to abstract from negativity and emotions. Any experience is useful and necessary, and if you consider situations from different angles, breaking them down into components, you can quickly get to the bottom of things and.

Be imperfect

No one is perfect, there is not a single absolutely flawless and ideal person. And this applies not only to others, but also to yourself. If you accept this as a given, life will become much easier, events will be perceived more easily, negative will cease to cause feelings. Adequately evaluate yourself and others, give up anger - there is nothing so important that it would be worth your suffering.

Enjoy life

The only way to get rid of the negative is through the positive. Strive to see everything positive sides, to live every moment as if it were the last, to perceive every day with joy and a smile. You can get pleasure from any thing. Even sitting at home and doing nothing, thank life for the fact that you can see, hear, breathe, communicate with loved ones. Thank life for the fact that you live at all, and remember that someday you will also be gone. Are your current problems important in the face of death?

Postpone things

If you feel that you are about to break loose, that it is already unbearable to work or do some business, abstract from emotions by simply postponing work. Reschedule things for half an hour, for two hours, for tomorrow. Instead, do what you love, take a walk, sleep. Distraction helps to cool down and refocus on positive thoughts. If something doesn't work out for you, moving away from it, you can find a new way to solve the problem. In addition, more does not always mean better - you can miss the details, make mistakes, overwork, and generally get sick. Distribute the load optimally and there will be more achievements in your life.

Drive away bad thoughts

Even when nothing bad is happening, you can think about bad things. and fears are easily overcome when you begin to rethink them and understand their causes. When you realize that your anxiety has no explainable reason, how to abstract from it will no longer be such a big problem. If there really is a reason, think about how to resolve the situation. Any fears disappear as soon as a person begins to look into their eyes.

Take it easy

Many people complicate everything, thereby worsening their mental and emotional condition. But everything, absolutely everything can be looked at more simply. Consciousness is simply used to reacting negatively to some things, but if you think about them, they may not be worth a damn. Is the boss screaming? Yes, let him shout to himself - let him try to boil water with his cry. Bad grades in class? Yes, and God bless her - with this mark - tomorrow there will be five. Quarreled with your spouse? And what of it - dear ones scold - they only amuse themselves. Not enough money? When were they enough? Yes, and happiness is not in money, and not even in their quantity. Any situation can be simplified and even translated into a pun. And this is a great way to abstract from the negative.

Become kinder

Have you noticed that good people everything is fine? Let them have troubles, let them have problems, let them have hardships - but they are doing well. Being kind is very helpful, but kindness isn't just for babies or kittens. You need to be kind to events, situations, and other people, including those who “negative” you. Try to perceive everything as if you are truly a holy person. Ask yourself, how would Nicholas the Wonderworker take this? You will see - the brain itself will tell you how to behave, and it will become much easier to abstract. And also, being kinder, you will begin to attract good people, good events, good news into your life.

Learn to concentrate

The ability to abstract from the bad is the skill of concentrating on the good. Everything is extremely simple here: do not pay attention to what hurts your feelings, what makes your blood boil, what pisses you off. Instead, remember the faces of loved ones, switch to funny things that happened during the day, mentally draw pictures from jokes. Do anything that can be associated with joy, hope, good sadness, happiness, love, and other positive emotions. You can read about how to improve the ability to focus in our article "".

Control the positive

It may sound strange, but still you need to be able to abstract from negative emotions, and from positive ones. If you hover in the clouds all the time and look at the world through rose-colored glasses, at one fine moment you can hit the ground well. Rejoice, laugh, sing songs, be happy, but understand that these states are destined to end, because you will spend your energy, and they will lose their intensity. As in everything, there must be a measure here too. BUT The best way to rejoice is also a switch of attention to affairs and worries. Such is the human psyche - soaring on the wings of happiness, it is easy to lose vigilance, forget, not have time to do something important. Keep this in mind, and keep balance and harmony within yourself.

And in conclusion, I just want to note that the development of skills and qualities that are useful for life, such as awareness, inner peace, concentration, and gratitude, always helps to abstract from the outside world, noises and sounds, negative emotions and experiences.

Be sure to make plans, motivate yourself, strive for new goals and achievements, read interesting and educational books, meditate and relax, develop. Having filled your life with these things, you can abstract from anything easily and naturally.

And to bring some more positive inside yourself, watch this wonderful video from the famous TV presenter and Comedy Club resident Pavel Volya. We wish you happiness and the ability to always and everywhere be yourself.