A clear sign that your previous relationship with someone is still not completed is a repetition of the relationship development scenario. That is, those same - the notorious "rake".

When you break up with all your partners in the same scenario. Or when one of the links in the business structure is constantly "weak" - no matter who starts working there, it constantly "breaks": people themselves leave this particular position, or some events occur that interfere with business processes in this particular position. plot.

Both in the case of personal relationships and in the case of business relationships, if you want everything to go smoothly, you will need to “look at the root” - that is, explore the very first relationship in which you first stepped on these already disgusting you now "rake". And if these relations did not end quite calmly for all parties, you can try to even out the balance now.

This is done using the method system constellations– if you seek help from a systemic therapist. But you can try to do it yourself - by conducting the so-called arrangements of the imagination.

The simplest version of such constellations, which is available to anyone, is to mentally imagine, alone with yourself, a person with whom the relationship has not yet been completed. If it’s already completely difficult for you with imagination, put some object in front of you that will play the role of this person. What follows is, looking into the eyes of your imaginary partner, calmly, without emotion, admit everything that happened between you and how it affected you. And all the bad things must be acknowledged first. But be sure to use a constructive model of conversation.

For example, if a man left a woman, then she can say the following: “You cheated on me. I was very hurt". Such a phrase speaks of a fact that describes the bad that was caused to her, but, at the same time, about her feelings. And everything that is remembered should be in just such a bundle: fact - emotion, fact - emotion.

In other words, you need to build a conversation as if you were actually talking to your partner., but constructively - without insulting the person himself, but with a statement of facts and your emotional state due to what happened. A conversation in this vein does not escalate the situation, affecting the partner’s emotions, but allows you to explain to him the connection between what happened and the subsequent change in your emotional background.

And according to this scheme, you need to remember all the bad things that you remember now - because if you still remember it, and even with emotions, it means that resentment towards your partner is still deep in you.

By the way, if such constellations are carried out not in the imagination, but with the help of deputies (people who will temporarily portray your partner or even you, if you have a couple of assistants), then in the case of a really incomplete relationship with someone, you will see that either the deputies cannot calmly look into each other's eyes, or it will be quite difficult for you to do it yourself. Even if in the arrangement, someone from those with whom you have a trusting relationship in life acts as a substitute, and you usually calmly look into his eyes.

However, for the purity of the experiment, it is desirable that people who take a neutral position in relation to what happened act as deputies - that is, they do not emotionally take sides.

You ask why they use substitutes for system constellations at all? I answer: the easiest way to figure out what is happening inside the system is to temporarily exit it yourself.

• Being in the position of an outside observer, it’s easier for you to see what is really happening between people, how they react to each other, where they look and how they feel.
• Being inside the system it is difficult for you to objectively look at what is happening, and on a purely physical level it is impossible to see everything that is happening around you - you can be sideways or back to someone, and this person can seriously influence what is happening inside the system.

But let us return to the continuation of the description of the arrangement of the imagination. The next step: after working through all the bad things you remember, you must definitely remember all the good things. For example, in the case of the woman described above, she could say the following: “I am grateful to you for the love that was between us, for our common children. If it wasn't for you, they wouldn't be there either." In general, if later, looking at her children, a woman can calmly see in them their father, the woman’s former partner, then the fate of the children themselves will be more successful. Otherwise, role substitution may occur.

How do imagination constellations work?

Very simple! If the mother tells the child that his father is bad, then the child subconsciously identifies himself with the "bad" dad and can manifest himself in relations with the mother in the same way as the "bad father" did, and even repeat his fate in some way, or bad habits, although, it seems, in the present there are no prerequisites for this. And this is very well illustrated by the constellations according to the method of Bert Hellinger.

That is why, when conducting family constellations, the model of the current family most often includes the former wives and husbands of family members, and even the subsequent spouses of these "former", as well as those who were the very first love, even if these relationships did not end in marriage.

So, if you really deeply carry out such an arrangement according to the scenario described above, then you will feel the energy of that love that was once between you and your former partner. And this feeling of the flow of love will be a sign that you have energetically completed your relationship with him.

The same principle is used to end relationships with unfairly dismissed subordinates - if we talk about the aspect of business relationships, and to end relationships with betrayed fellow comrades - if there were any.

Although, as one psychologist friend of mine wisely remarked, the word "betrayal" should be considered as derived from the word "transfer." And if there hadn’t been any of the betrayals in your life, you probably wouldn’t have moved to a new level of your own development, where you were “transferred” - it’s been known for a long time: “thunder will not strike, the peasant will not cross himself” ...

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Sun, 24 March, 2019 - 19:00

Individual Arrangement is the only method that allows you not only to look into your Soul, but also to restore the order that you dream of.

Who is primarily intended for this method?

Who LOOKING for opportunities, not excuses.

You may have different problems, health, lack of money, relationships with people, internal contradictions.

All of them are solvable.

And their solution begins with the Realization that you are their source. There is a reason within you that you feel your problem and do not have what you need. Until you find out and eliminate this cause, everything will remain the same.

If you are determined to figure out what your life is trying to tell you through your situation, an outside perspective will open up new perspectives for you.

I have a considerable number of strong techniques and methods that allow you to determine both the cause of what is happening and the solution to your problems.

“Follow the images of the Soul, not the images of the Mind” - following the desires of your Soul, you will come to true happiness.

If you put things in order, first of all, in your thoughts and feelings, then you will be amazed at how much everything will change around you.

What is the success, the uniqueness of this method?

Individual constellation is a unique method of short-term therapy (some advanced psychologists know that 500 hours of psychoanalysis can be put into one constellation, the average duration of which is 60-120 minutes!).

It allows you to diagnose any complex life situation to see what is actually going on in the depths of the Soul. And, having seen the cause of the existing problem, gently eliminate it ...

Constellation is a way of finding and correcting the limitations that are blocking our aspirations to be successful, healthy and happy. It is considered the simplest and effective method solutions to difficult life situations.

The solutions found in the process of constellation release powerful forces that become a resource for the desired changes, which allows you to lay a good foundation for your future.

As practice shows, the most common cause of most psychological illness and human problems is the violation of tribal and family ties.

Bert Hellinger characterizes his method as follows: “It is very important that the psychotherapist finds that point in the generic system where all the energy of a person’s love is concentrated, since here is both the root of his family problem and the key to resolving difficulties.”

What the arrangement works with:

- health problems
- conflict relationships
- problems at work
- personal life does not add up, loneliness, the wrong men come across, you need to end the relationship and let go of the partner;

- fears
- depression
- rejection of self
The feeling that you are not living your own life.
- money problems, understand the cause of problems with the business and how to eliminate them,

- remove anxiety about the future,
- it is difficult for you to make a choice and you need more information about what is happening,
- you can not understand your feelings and the feelings of a partner,
- problems with children / parents,
- bad luck
Need support in a difficult situation.

You understand that this needs to be stopped and your life filled with love, reciprocity, pleasure and a state of realization.

And also want to understand:

What kind of partner do you need
- how to become the most expensive and beloved for your partner

During the individual arrangement, the participants become aware of the causes of lack of money, loneliness, serious illnesses and accidents that occurred in the family.

Unfinished processes of the past in the family (or clan) unconsciously involve the living members in what was a long time ago. This is how the law of balancing the system operates. Descendants, obeying these laws, are called upon to complete what their ancestors have not completed: to burn out, finish, live something for someone ...

Thus, a person finds himself in a subconscious trap, intertwined with the fate of his ancestors. Without realizing it, he does not live his own life, solves his own life tasks ...

For example:

- a beautiful and smart woman does not find a match for herself - she is in the weave;

- you work hard, but in the end you have no money;

- you take care of your health, eat normally, avoid drafts, but still get sick often;

- you know that drinking is harmful and you still get drunk in a subconscious desire for death ...

Do not console yourself with the words: "accident, it happens." Do not blame viruses, stress, the political situation or the environment for what is happening to you. Understand yourself. Behind each such accident lies a serious systemic underlying reason.

The method of constellations allows you to "unravel" such an interweaving. Live in the present, not in the past.

Family weaving is easy to recognize:

- if the situation that you live has no explanation from the point of view of real life - this is intertwining.

- if the feelings that you experience do not correspond to the real situation by the strength of their manifestation (for example: there is fear, but there is no reason; there is jealousy, but there was no betrayal; sadness - for no apparent reason ...) ...

Most likely you are intertwined with someone and these feelings are not yours. They are from your family. And once in the past, these feelings were quite adequate to some situation.

"Man is born for happiness, like a bird for flight." And it is. Each of us is born with a full set of possibilities to build happy life. The only question is: how to build a successful present, being in the past? Lacking full contact with reality? With myself?

Decide to live in your real happy present, freed from the invisible fetters of the past!!!

How is the placement going?

The constellator tests the client through questions, reveals his secondary benefits, a wounded subpersonality, which leads to conflict situations.

Exploring the feeling or emotion that worries you at the moment, we go to the temporary layer in your subconscious when the event happened.

We reveal the reason why you unconsciously fixed your awareness on that event. Together we re-experience this event on a sensual level and it ceases to affect you.

The placement algorithm is very simple - there is no need for mysterious words and mind-blowing reasoning - I named, arranged and received information. All! This, of course, surprises, shocks, confuses, delights, sometimes causes indignation. But no one has remained indifferent!

How much can you trust the solution found in the constellation?

The client himself can make decisions and draw any conclusions, thanks to his lived feelings. This brings changes to real life At once!

I stopped resisting the questions "how to arrange the arrangement for myself" and began to collect constructive ideas :) Additions and new ideas are welcome :)

Arrangements for oneself (for the time being, without a group, that is, in splendid isolation in general) are difficult because the person himself cannot feel the excluded dynamics in his system. If he had felt them, he would have deciphered and lived them long ago. But he cannot feel them directly, and that is why he lives "someone else's fate."
However, there are some things you can do for yourself.
Let's start simple :)

The first idea: "Let's go to the cinema?"

So, to go or not to go to the cinema? Should I go to Professor Preobrazhensky's seminar? Stay in Verkhnyaya Pyshma at the Sheraton or Hilton hotel?

Today at 19-00 in the cinema. The Moscow City Council is filming "The Elusive Avengers". Do I need to go there?

In a room where (preferably) there is no furniture and enough free space, we mark the place "I'm in the cinema named after the Moscow City Council on Elusive Avengers today." You can mark it, for example, with a sheet of drawing paper. Just put the paper on the floor. Better not an A4 sheet, because in the cinema you are surrounded by space, and in the arrangement it is better to be surrounded by space too. Smaller furniture is better so as not to catch extra speakers in chairs and tables, both from the cinema and your own.

We stand at a distance from the drawing paper, look at it and slowly walk. We monitor our condition. Sometimes already at this stage one feels, for example, "an insurmountable barrier". You can put it on a chair or stretch it with a rope.

Sometimes it suddenly becomes clear that "there will be no kina", i.e. there is simply no object of our movement. If this event is really announced in the poster and it is today (and not in six months), then this is very strange. Two options - either it really won’t happen (you looked at the wrong poster), or you got into some kind of dynamics with this movie and are simply not able to stage and see “just a movie”. For example, in the cinema Moscow City Council 20 years ago, Mitya said that this is your last date. You have long forgotten this, but the body remembers .... Or it was said by the groom to your grandmother.

Just in case, you can put "where this actually leads me" (also a chair) and see if this figure is visible. If the figure evokes strong sensations and another barrier rises, we have arrived. Keane will not. You for a professional placement.

The difficulty with this arrangement is that the "movie" target is quite difficult to place. For example, if the building of the cinema them. The Moscow City Council is being attacked by raiders from Truba LLC, then the owners of the building and these raiders radiate such trash into the space that it can score anything. If the film is "cult" and a million people have already watched it, then it already has an "egregore" and it can make noise so that you won't find yourself there. All the girls are already in love with Lanovoy, and on the spot "in the cinema" you feel the energy of girls touched by the head, and not yourself in this cinema today.
A professional arranger could clean up the trash and put the configuration cleaner, but we don’t want to do it ... :)

And yet: "I'm in the cinema named after the Moscow Council on the Elusive Avengers today."
We stand on whatman, we feel. Well, how are you today? :-))

You can complicate the task and divide the object into (for example): "what kind of film", "what kind of people", "how are they fed", etc.
It is possible that the film is garbage, then there you will meet Petya ... Or a classmate Masha and she will say that ...

Important addition: When it comes to whether to go to the cinema with Vasya from a parallel class, the arrangement should be completely different! About this next edition of our radio show.

About the hotel, I put, for example, "silence". If there is no silence, then I do not need "comfort", "location in the center" and so on.
About seminars, you can separately put "personal benefit", "usefulness in learning", "people", "status / for a piece of paper", etc.

Hellinger constellations are a kind of psychotherapeutic method of group or individual orientation. It designates a person as a part of the system, the source of whose problems is determined by the life and actions of the representatives of his family. Studying ​information about constellations ​according to ​Hellinger​ ​and about their independent implementation, will help to realize the processes of the subconscious and look at various situations in a new way.

What​​are​​systemic​​constellations

The creator of the constellation system is the German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger, who in his methodology indicated the presence of intra-family patterns that lead to negative, destructive consequences. it psychological direction gained popularity and popularity, despite his youth.

The essence of Bert Hellinger's constellations is to find the cause and solution of the problem that has arisen in the human pedigree. It is believed that unresolved life tasks, unlived scenarios, mistakes of the past are reflected in the client's present.

According to constellation psychology, “family weaving” occurs when descendants work through situations that the ancestors did not complete. It is possible to determine such a course of events if there is no reasonable explanation for the troubles that happened in life (a person works hard, but money is not added, he observes healthy lifestyle life, but often gets sick, suffers from jealousy in the absence of treason, etc.).

By resorting to the constellation method, the client makes contact with a representative of the clan and resolves his conflict, while helping himself. The work of a psychologist with a person occurs systematically, the sources of negativity and problems are eliminated not only in the present, but also in previous generations.

The constellator, with the help of people who are strangers to the client (“deputies” of his relatives), creates an image of the situation, which is subject to detailed study and elaboration. Individual constellations are used, when using figurines instead of representatives of the genus or playing scenarios in one's own imagination. In these cases, it is possible to independently apply the method, having mastered the necessary skills.

According to Hellinger's research, there are key orders (laws) in the systems of generic constellations, non-observance of which leads to negative consequences:

• Give and take balance. It consists in maintaining balance, each element of the system brings and takes something in a relationship (love, care, money, gifts, etc.). Imbalance causes family interweaving (for example, a child becomes its victim when the balance of the parents is disturbed).
• Law of Hierarchy. It is determined by the order of entry into the system: the first generations have a greater advantage than subsequent ones. Violation of the hierarchy leads to negative consequences. For example, if a child performs the function of a parent, this leads to his overload: he does not study well, gets sick, and later on is unhappy in marriage.
• System membership. Every member of the family has the right to a place in it. The system does not take into account whether a person is a criminal or a saint, whether he is alive or dead. When order is violated, family interweaving arises (the living with the dead, with relatives with a difficult fate, etc.). At the same time, a person hardly controls his actions, desires, lives someone else's life. It is possible to correct the situation by restoring the order of ownership of those excluded from the system.

What is the danger of the method

It is widely believed that Hellinger constellations are dangerous. This is due to the lack of scientific substantiation of the method, its mystical orientation, the presence of conflicting reviews about the sessions.

There are the following dangers when using constellations:

• Lack of scientific basis and unequivocal certainty. This is due to the unreliability of the information received, the inability to objectively assess the benefits and harms of the measures taken.
• Temporary obsession. In this case, we are talking about substitutes trying on other people's personalities. The principle of operation of this phenomenon cannot be explained by constellators. Deputies do not imitate, do not play a role, they really live through the scenarios of strangers, feeling their experiences, worries, connections, and so on. In this case, hypnosis is not used, the person does not lose awareness of himself. Danger is the difficulty in exiting the role, the risk of subsequent communication with the substitute. For this reason, it is not recommended to replace the dead, people with a difficult fate, serious illnesses, and so on. When carrying out the technique, ways out of the role are used; in case of difficulties, one should seek help from the constellator.
• Own conjectures of deputies. The conclusions of individuals should not be taken into account, the result is determined by evaluating the system as a whole. The substitute should not voice his own opinion, information about the replaced object should come without distortion.
• Unprofessionalism. Wrong arrangements, incorrect transmission of information can harm the client.
• Changes in the emotional sphere, the manifestation of hidden, repressed feelings. A person opens up new sides of himself and the world around him, sensations, you have to look into the eyes of fear, experience some situations anew, including psychotraumatic ones. Sometimes this causes a strong emotional outburst, as the entry into the scenario occurs abruptly, without preparation.
• Negative consequences with frequent constellations. The changes launched after the session continue for a certain period of time (from a day to several months, a year), based on the complexity of the problem. In the case of the imminent application of the next arrangement, the previous process is interrupted, remaining incomplete. The frequency for each person is determined individually.

Contraindications

• during pregnancy;
• children;
• with diseases in the acute stage (bodily and mentally);
• in a state of alcoholic and drug intoxication;
• with mystical requests for placement.

Arrangement methods

With the development of system constellations, not only classical family constellations, but also their other types began to be used. Methods aimed at resolving human problems in various fields life.

Constellations are used to unravel family entanglements, make forecasts, to determine relationships in the work team, to improve them, in order to personal development, stabilization of the emotional background, physical well-being and so on.

Family

The classical family constellation works with problems in the family, intrapersonal conflicts, and negative family attitudes. More often the session is held in a group. At the core psychological method lies the reproduction of a part of a person's system with the help of his relatives' deputies, who at the same time feel and experience emotions characteristic of real people. Intra-family relationships, relationships, and influences become visible, which is important for eliminating the “interlacing” and solving the problem.

It is obligatory to observe the correct functioning of the system, where each element occupies a certain place and performs the role imposed on it. Violation of the rules leads to negative consequences.

Structural

Arrangements of this type are intended for the study of integral structures consisting of abstract components. The method is usually based on structures from other techniques: 5 elements of the Chinese tradition, Tarot cards, astrology, and so on. The principle of operation of such an arrangement involves 2 tools at the same time.

The method solves problems in structures such as fears, health, work, well-being, and so on. This also includes symptom constellations that work with physical condition organism.

Organizational

Constellations are designed to resolve conflict situations, evaluation of professional relations, problem solving in organizations, work collectives. The method can help the client understand his position, role in the system in which he works or manages.

Business constellations allow you to make correct, effective decisions based on many factors: past experience, state, relationship structure, and so on. Ideal method for working with family businesses.

Client

The method is considered part of organizational constellations. It is intended for persons of a certain type of profession who provide assistance to people of various kinds (doctors, social workers, teachers, psychologists, etc.).

The arrangement reveals the relationship between the helping party and the receiving party, evaluates its effectiveness, the need for it, corrects it, sets goals, and more.

Spiritual

The basis of the constellation is the realization that the fate of the client and his family system is driven by the Spirit. Harmony, inner balance come to a person through agreement with him, problems - through rejection of oneself in the Spirit. The method does not use denial, the desire to solve the problem, get rid of failures. However, the connection with the Spirit can manifest itself with precisely such positive effects.

The purpose of the constellator is to create space for the client to determine the movement of the Spirit in his life. When conducting the arrangement, a short request of a person is used (or not used at all), free movement deputies, sometimes without voicing roles, without looking for a “good solution”.

Ways to conduct

There are several ways to carry out arrangements. The choice is made based on the preferences of the client, his desire and ability to open up to other people, the presence of a group, and so on. At the same time, the basic principles of conducting system constellations in different ways are identical.

In a group

In the most common version, the constellation method is carried out in a group. The facilitator (constellator) interviews the client: finds out the problem, asks to name significant people from different generations for him, important tribal events in their lives. At the same time, the psychotherapist puts forward theories about family relationships, based on the voiced facts and emotions of a person.

For the role of relatives, the client or the constellator chooses deputies from among the group members. After that, they are arranged based on their position in the system. This is how the field in question is designated, the substitutes are immersed in roles. There is a translation of the processes of the family system. Deputies feel the feelings of those being replaced: mother - love for the child, hostile elements - aggression towards each other, sister - longing for the deceased brother, and so on. It is possible to add new roles and their deputies during the process of arrangements, while the changes that have occurred in the system are tracked.

The facilitator asks the relatives about their condition, feelings, the location and relationships between the elements establish violations related to the client's problem. Next, the search for the correct solution is carried out by changing the location of the deputies, rearranging them, pronouncing permissive phrases (helping to bring the client closer to resolving the situation). As a result, the family field changes, the causes of the resulting negative consequences disappear.

In the process of constellations, the client is usually an outside observer and enters the field to perform key actions, work out and consolidate the solution.

On figurines

The method is carried out without the participation of the group. Constellations are performed individually, they involve the constellator and the client. When mastering the skills, it is possible to independently conduct the method.

The essence of the arrangement is to use figurines instead of living substitutes, objects symbolizing representatives of the genus. Cups, stationery, tables, chairs and more can be used. On sale there are special sets with figures for constellations. The principle of operation of the method is identical to the classical one. Relationships, connections, emotions are revealed, the solution to the problem is determined by the interaction of the elements of the system.

However, the arrangement differs in the way information is read. In the classical scheme, it is transmitted by living participants, which is not possible with this option. For this reason, special reading methods are used. The most common way to obtain information is through the place of a substitute. The contributor or client alternately takes the position of the thing that translates the processes in the system, and transmits necessary information. It is possible to receive information through touching the figures, through the aura of the field, and so on.

Working in a group is distinguished by a greater depth and information content of the constellation process, however, for some clients, due to personality traits or the nature of the problem, the technique with figures becomes preferable.

in the imagination

This type of constellation is carried out in the client's imagination, while the process involves a person who solves his problem, and a constellator. The advantages of the method are the absence of additional human resources, the reduction of the time of constellations. The session is possible at individual personal meetings, remotely (via Skype) or independently (after mastering the technique).

The arrangement is made before the inner eye of the client. First, a relative is established through whom the problem affects life. Then the client in his own imagination creates various images verbal interaction with a family member until one of them allows contact with him. This is manifested by a sharp emotional outburst, catharsis. Further communication should lead the client to resolving the problem, identifying its essence, to understanding the causes, violations, mistakes that provoked negative consequences.

Result

There are a lot of conflicting reviews on the Internet about Hellinger constellations. In some cases, the method is perceived by people as an exclusively theatrical performance, an unsuccessful experience in solving a problem, in others - as a powerful psychotherapeutic tool, by resolving serious situations.

It is believed that as a result of the attitudes, the psychotherapist eliminates the violation and allows the person to get rid of the “weave”. The client reinforces the image of a “good decision” and gradually it is implemented in his life. The system is being restructured, significant changes are possible on life path: breaking old relationships, finding new ones, positive and negative transformations that need to be worked out (gaining independence, responsibility, recovery, reconciliation of warring parties, payment of "old debts", etc.).

After constellations, people often feel an internal unconscious change, they feel the extraordinary importance of what happened. It is recommended after the session not to discuss, not to analyze what happened, try not to leave the process, not to suppress it, but to accept and assimilate it.

How often do we hear terms that are not entirely clear. For example, "Hellinger arrangements" - what is it? Let's start with the fact that the author of this method, Bert Hellinger, is a well-known German psychologist, philosopher, teacher and practitioner. His works are relatively young and are aimed at solving human problems.

What did Hellinger study?

The scientist formulated some laws and patterns that lead to undesirable events, conflicts between spouses or colleagues. Hellinger worked for a long time on such questions: “How does the adoption of feelings occur? How does conscience (personal or family) influence the way of life of a person? Is there a system that governs relationships? In fact, these are just a few of the topics in a whole list of Burt's teachings.

Today, his arrangements are becoming more and more in demand. With this method, a large number of people have been able to find the origins of their troubles and eradicate them. Many practicing psychotherapists are increasingly using Hellinger constellations in their work with groups, couples, or individuals with individuals.

"Space" is the place of the individual in space. The method itself resembles a game of chess. That is, each participant is assigned a specific role that reflects his subconscious image in a situation that requires elaboration. This can be not only a family situation, but also problems in the team, failures in business.

Arrangement method according to Bert Hellinger. Session start

So, a man comes to a psychotherapist with an urgent problem. To begin with, the specialist conducts a short conversation with him, during which it is decided whether he needs an arrangement or everything is much simpler. After all, you can direct a person with ordinary everyday advice - and his life will go back to normal. But when the situation is complicated, a more detailed conversation is conducted with the client.

To begin with, the problem itself is highlighted. For example, in this case, a man drinks, his wife “saws” him daily and believes that everything family problems associated with alcoholism. The man, on the other hand, does not think so. After all, before his marriage, he did not drink so much alcohol.

The therapist asks the client to talk about their lifestyle. Hellinger constellations require a systematic consideration of the problem. That is, it is important to understand what each of the spouses is doing all day, what kind of relationship they have in general, which is why conflicts occur. Finally, individuals are themselves in family life or play someone else's role.

The specialist separately considers the parents of the husband and his wife. How did they behave with each other in the family? If it turns out that on the part of the man, the father and mother lived in perfect harmony and there were no problems with alcoholism, then the wife's relatives are given the most attention.

Having previously sorted out the first conversation, the specialist recommends that the man come to the next appointment with his wife. After all, the root of evil is most likely in her, and it is impossible to get rid of it without her participation.

After all, she did not work out family life, and all the time she asked her daughter the installation: “Look, all men are the same. Your father is just like everyone else. Drinks, brings home a penny. With imposed thoughts, the daughter grows up and involuntarily notices only negative traits in the surrounding men.

Nevertheless, the girl begins to meet with a nice guy. Soon our heroine marries him, but after a while it seems to her that her husband is not “her person” at all. Whatever he does, everything she sees is negative.

It would seem that the chosen one is not so bad, his positive features outweigh the disadvantages. But the woman continues to maintain internal aggressiveness and sends him negativity at the energy level. A man catches this signal, realizes that his partner despises him, and gradually begins to seek solace in alcohol. This helps him forget for a while, but the problem remains.

The following actions

The Hellinger constellation method involves playing roles. The psychotherapist offers a married couple to lose a certain situation. For example, he asks a woman to describe how she behaves in the workplace. The patient comments on her official behavior, communication with colleagues, and it turns out that she is “white and fluffy” at work.

What changes when she crosses the threshold of the house? Why does a man irritate a woman by his appearance alone? The couple play the quarrel scene in front of a psychotherapist. The wife tells her husband her usual phrase: "I would stop drinking, and everything would work out."

From that moment on, the specialist asks the couple to stop. System-family constellations according to Hellinger require you to concentrate on an important point in time. In the case of this couple, that time has come.

The therapist says to a married couple, "Let's try to understand the source of the problem that forces one of you to drink." Further, all the reasons contributing to this are crossed out. For example, the following are excluded: big money problems, workplace conflicts for a man, health problems. What remains?

The patient frankly admits that he is oppressed by the eternal discontent of his wife, who constantly finds fault with something or, conversely, is silent and avoids marital intimacy. In this case, the partner suffers from a lack of female energy.

Often, due to a lack of love for a partner or out of a sense of resentment, female representatives punish the chosen one in this way. They actively sublimate their energy into caring for children or load themselves with household chores. While the spouse is trying to get some kind of positive attitude by drinking alcohol. There is a vicious circle.

In the future, Hellinger arrangements imply a deep study of the problem. In this case, the therapist will try to inspire the woman with the idea of ​​the need to eradicate the attitude that her mother unwittingly asked.

By her behavior, the wife provokes a man to drink alcohol, in fact, she makes her play the role of her alcoholic father. If, along with this, the woman still has some resentment towards her husband, then during the session it is proposed to get rid of her. "It's important to free yourself from negativity," says Bert Hellinger. family constellations offer a lot of techniques for this.

In fact, the whole process is not as simple as it seems at first glance. In the history of this married couple, the specialist will have to give the characters new “roles”, and in such a way that an even exchange of energies takes place between them.

The impact of egregor on a person

After a constellation session, you may be surprised: “How did it happen that I began to play a role in life that was not my own? Why did I speak with someone else's thoughts? In fact, few people think about whether he really does what he wants, and whether he lives the way he wants it.

In most cases, it turns out that our daily thoughts, feelings and actions are borrowed by us from the people around us: our own family, team and society as a whole. In other words, a certain energy-information space (egregor) has its direct impact on the personality.

Each society (collective) is subject to a certain system of values. The influence of egregor can be both positive and negative. Everyone develops their own value system. For example, a church egregore seeks to influence people through sermons.

And any terrorist organization creates its own egregor, manipulating the consciousness of the participants with a certain theory. Sometimes stronger personalities can create their own egregors and influence others. Such an individual should be the most energy-intensive, since his task is to lead and influence, that is, to manage many energy flows. Egregores are described in detail in one of Bert's works entitled "Hellinger Constellations". The book tells that often the root of the problem can be found in life values ​​that are passed down through the family.

life stories

Family gender is a system that has its own specific tasks. And family members (mother, father, son, daughter) are elements that must fulfill their functions. What happens if someone gets kicked out of the system? For example, the son did not want to become a military man in spite of the family dynasty. And my father really wanted it.

In this case, the function of the son may be redistributed among other members of the family, or it may be overplayed: the daughter marries an officer. The father is extremely happy, tries to establish strong contact with his son-in-law and shares plans for the future to continue the military tradition.

The method of the German psychotherapist deeply affects the problem of the older and younger generations. Can the Hellinger arrangement help everyone? Reviews about this are different. However, most agree that ancestral egregors can have a negative impact on descendants.

For example, a young woman is deeply unhappy in her marriage. It would seem that all methods of resuscitation of relations are ineffective, rudeness and violence reign in the family. There is only one way out - divorce. But the older generation of this woman unanimously repeats: “There were no divorced people in our family. We do not accept this and it is considered a disgrace.”

That is, the generic egregor of this woman dictates her principles to her and requires submission. Only a complete rethinking and rejection of the role of a “victim” will help such a person make an important decision and start a new life.

hereditary aggression

Hellinger's systemic constellations help many couples and individuals to deeply understand the origins of evil. Here is a simple example of a problem with which men often turn to psychotherapists.

So, a conditional young man came to see a psychologist. He could not understand his behavior towards women. After numerous divorces, he faced the fact - the chosen ones leave because of his unmotivated aggression.

In all other areas of life, the man seemed positive. During a conversation with a specialist, it turned out that the man had once “unconsciously” tuned in to a revenge program. How did it come about?

As a rule, in such a situation it turns out that the patient grew up in a family where the father was constantly humiliated and depressed by his wife. The boy could not resist his mother in order to protect his father. Thus, as he grew older, the young man worked out his own plan (revenge program).

This led to the fact that, being in a relationship with the girls, he periodically felt a fierce hatred for them. As soon as the right opportunity came, he took out his anger on them with his fists. Bert Hellinger's arrangement should show the man that these feelings do not belong to him. They are inspired and fixed in the mind from a distant childhood. But the client has a different situation, and the girls have a different character than his mother.

And most importantly, he can become happy only when he realizes this and begins to change. This is a gradual process. Much depends on the natural temperament of the individual. One needs 2 sessions, while the other will need several. The method of arrangement according to Bert Hellinger is unique in that knowing family systems (orders), a person can not only avoid failures in life, but also protect future generations from them.

How does the group method work?

Let's talk about group sessions. The phenomenon of these activities is that a group of people live the roles actors in the client's problem. Situations can be different: a person cannot find a mate, is constantly ill or has financial difficulties, although there are no good reasons for this.

The Hellinger constellation method is difficult to explain in detail, but it happens according to this scenario: the corresponding roles are distributed among the participants. And they begin to feel similar emotions of those who asked for help. The phenomenon has received the term "substitutive perception".

That is, there is a transfer of internal images from the client to all participants and to the space in which the arrangement takes place. People selected for specific roles are called "deputies". During the session, they aloud assess their condition, trying to restore the problematic situation.

Systemic constellations according to Hellinger help the main person to unravel the tangle of their conflict situations, build the correct hierarchy and restore energy balance. The work is built by moving "deputies" in the field of arrangement due to various rituals.

The session can be considered successful if all participants do not feel discomfort. And - most importantly - there should be physical and psychological relief for the client. The arrangement method according to Bert Hellinger forces to fully activate different levels perceptions: emotional, mental, auditory, tactile.

What does this method give?

As a result, the individual receives a new look at his problem, acquiring a different model of behavior. Certainly the most The best way evaluate the methodology - take part in the group session yourself. It is real experience that will help you find out how it works in practice.

Nowadays, many have already heard about such a method as Hellinger constellations. There are also negative reviews about it. But despite this, the popularity of this method is growing. After all, the range of sessions is quite expanded - this is psychotherapy, medicine, pedagogy, and even esotericism.

All information obtained during the sessions is confidential. In order to take part in group work, there must be motivation and a conscious desire. To date, it is not difficult to find a Hellinger constellation group. In Moscow, the number of fans of this method is constantly growing, as it is recognized as professional.

Arrangement using tarot cards

Finally, we come to the part that leaves an esoteric imprint on the method of the German psychotherapist. The fact is that not every person can come to a group of people and openly talk about their problem. In this case, a person can participate in a group session, but at his request, a hidden arrangement takes place. That is, the client himself doses the openness of information. A great way out of this situation is the arrangement of Bert Hellinger using Tarot cards.

The deck in this case serves as a tool for diagnosing the ongoing process. The client is asked the question: “What is the essence of your problem?” A person chooses, without looking, a card, and describes what he saw on it. "Deputies" are also selected, following the chosen arcana.

According to their problem, the client, with the help of the facilitator's prompts, shows each participant where to stand and what to do. The next stage is the emotional experience of the situation. "Deputies" exchange impressions: "I just thought that ...", "I got the feeling that ..."

At this point, the client is also included in the process. He listens to the opinions of all participants and takes the place of the one who hurt his emotions the most. And, based on new role, he says the words that he considers important.

The arrangement ends with a survey of each participant. Despite the fact that the client's problem is being played, the "deputies" are also under the close attention of the psychotherapist. It is important for him to know how this or that person felt in someone else's role, what he experienced and what conclusions he made.

Also, a specialist can evaluate the diagnostics on the maps - was it possible to fully provide assistance to the client or did the system not fully reveal the situation? After all, the customer is not immediately able to objectively evaluate the session. For this he will need time.

Individual placement

Is it possible to conduct such a session yourself? Not excluded. After all, not everyone has the opportunity or desire to work in a group. In this case, the arrangement according to Hellinger independently is possible.

True, for this one should get acquainted closely with the theory of the method of Bert Helling. And important to professional level understand the interpretation of tarot cards. So, the problem is indicated, and the cards will play the role of "deputies". The work is divided into three stages.

First - you should choose cards: yourself and "deputies". Next, you need to lay out the rest of the cards as your intuition tells you. Then, one by one, open and collect information from each, adding it to the big picture.

The second stage depends on the question posed. If it concerns a family, then cards of ancestors should be laid out from above, descendants - from below. If necessary, you can take additional cards if in doubt. During the process, it is necessary to move the "deputies", as would be the case with real people. It is recommended to listen to your physical and psychological sensations.

The third stage is completion. This happens when a person feels satisfaction from a lost situation. Based on the result of the interpretation, it is up to the client to decide whether he has worked through his problem.

To an uninitiated person it may seem that it was a fortune-telling session. But this is far from true. Individual Method constellation using Tarot is shown only to professionals. The rest is recommended to resort to this method under the guidance of a qualified psychotherapist.