Orphanages bring sadness and fear to everyone who has never been to them personally. Indeed, what could be sadder than thousands of babies growing up without parents in specialized institutions throughout our vast country? Meanwhile, instead of worrying and sympathizing at a distance, each of us can personally help orphans. Orphanages in Moscow are constantly in need of new employees and volunteers, finances and some specific things, and are also happy to accept people who have decided to become parents.

Everyone can help

The concept of charity in our country today is subjective. Almost every week we watch and read news about new charity events and foundation reports. Most often, organizations brag about the millions collected for the treatment of specific children, turnkey repairs made in children's institutions and other global actions. This situation stimulates the development of a stereotype - only wealthy people can do good, and charity as a phenomenon is an expensive pleasure. All this is a big delusion, even the Baby Houses in Moscow, despite the well-being of the region, gladly accept any help. And there is nothing wrong with the fact that you want to do a good deed, but today you have the opportunity to spend very little time and money.

Where to begin?

Assistance can be different - it is financial investments, communication with pupils, work in an institution on a voluntary basis. Decide right away how serious your intentions are, what resources you have. If you are afraid that you will not be able to constantly visit the Children's Home, it is reasonable to limit yourself to a transfer to a charitable foundation or a one-time trip to the chosen institution. For those who plan to devote a significant part of their lives to helping orphans, it is useful to think about regular visits or even patronage of the chosen kids. Decide on a specific orphanage or try to get to know experienced volunteers. All Orphanages in Moscow have their own special rules and strict requirements for voluntary helpers. It is important to learn and remember them as quickly as possible.

The needs of the orphanage

Many institutions have their own websites, where the topic with a list of necessary things is updated in a timely manner. Needs can be different: from specific toys to interior and household items. Those who wish to help can independently purchase some of the listed items or transfer money to purchase them. Review the organization's acceptance policy. Not every orphanage in Moscow accepts used clothes and toys. For a number of institutions, a prerequisite is the presence of labels and receipts confirming that the item is new. The same is true for food products. Some Baby Houses in Moscow are happy to accept cereals, juices and purees in the original packaging, while others flatly refuse such help.

What is patronage?

Children's institutions in Moscow and the region are well funded. For this reason, they often need help not material, but physical. We all know that vacancies "job, Baby House (Moscow)" are not prestigious. In institutions for infants and young children preschool age sometimes they allow volunteers (who have undergone a medical examination) to care for the wards. Also, many orphanages are not against the organization of holidays and one-time visits by volunteers. And yet, one of the main needs of orphans is communication. The best option for those who are confident in their own abilities and desire to help is patronage. This type relationship implies friendship. Usually, a volunteer gets to know the chosen child by correspondence, and only after the contact is established, does he come personally. This option is optimal, since the child's experiences will be less vivid if the boss stops communicating.

Baby House: Adoption (Moscow)

Because soon New Year, and many will want to polish their karma by showering gifts on completely unfamiliar children in the nearest orphanage, I decided to show you one important text. I warn you right away: the text tells why this is not possible. And the point is not at all in ethical considerations (although they are also in them), but in specific harm. But enough spoilers! Now you will find out for yourself.

Since I am not an expert in helping children, a professional will tell you about the problem. A few years ago, the magazine "Takie Dela" published an excellent article that explains why emergency gifts for children in orphanages are harmful. Unfortunately, over these few years the situation in Russia has hardly changed.

A word to Anna Puchkova, an expert in the field of charity, volunteering and corporate social responsibility:

“No gifts to orphanages. Yes, I don’t mean at all: “Guys, urgently help, this year we don’t have enough gifts for the unfortunate disadvantaged kids in orphanages,” I mean exactly: “Please, stop bullying over children from orphanages, showering them with gifts.

I understand that the text of this article will be very painful to read for about half of those who are going to do this (be strong, positive at the end). And the other half will silently and sadly nod and say: “Yes, I also talk about this all the time, but that doesn’t stop anyone.” I know that the first article will cause frustration or even aggression. Therefore, I want to say right away: “Yes, I also really love children and people in general”, “Yes, I myself also do something to help others, namely, I devote about 95% of my time to this, not counting sleep”, “Yes , at one time I visited a huge number of orphanages and even lived in one for a week, right in a group with children”, “Yes, I deal with volunteers from more than 20 regions of the country, and everywhere there is exactly the same as in Moscow” . So guys, instead of being frustrated, let's just try to make our help at least a little more effective, that's what we all want, right?

So, why is it still impossible to give gifts to orphanages, and what can be done instead?

Take, for example, an ideal situation, that is, a situation in which all children received the same gifts, all equally, an ideal situation that excludes the possibility that the gifts did not reach the children. A situation in which a teenager did not sell a gift to buy cigarettes or beer. Or when the gift wasn't used to make someone jealous or simply show superiority ("look what I have, you don't"), usually after that the gift is either broken or stolen as soon as the owner has distracted himself from it, and, of course, this is very bad both for the owner and for the one who broke or stole.

So, even in this ideal situation (and you understand that this does not happen?), giving gifts to orphanages, boarding schools, social shelters and other forms of state orphanages (I emphasize - especially state ones) is destructive for the child's psyche , because according to statistics, during the New Year holidays, a child from an orphanage visits about 17 Christmas trees and events and receives about 19 gifts (in the Moscow region - 25). Do you understand that this is just a survival marathon? Do you want to be the 26th who came running frantically to love a child you did not know yesterday? What about 18s? The saddest thing is that...

In the next month and a half, billions of rubles will be spent on toys, teddy bears, sleds, Barbies and even tablets, phones and iPods (yes, many children ask for exactly this, and many adults buy it for them, although they themselves guess that there is something it's not)

All this is monstrous because it brings up a terrible dependency, the child gets used to the fact that they give him something all the time, give, perform, and without any effort or visible reasons for him. Some exalted people constantly come who frantically try to love them all to death in half a day and move on (I know, because I myself was exactly the same). And then suddenly the child turns 18, and ... And nothing, no one goes to him, no one showers him with gifts, no one cares about the problems of "an adult healthy guy who has to go to work." Why should he? You only taught him to beg, you didn't teach him to earn. You taught him to accept gifts and amusements and thought that he should somehow guess about work. As a result, only 10% cope with this state of affairs, while the rest become drunkards, get into crime and prisons, and commit suicide. Think about it! ten%! 90%!

Children in orphanages (and I mean in this case all types of state institutions of this type) live according to the rules of a gloomy, inhuman and merciless system created at the beginning of the 20th century. Their pupils are not considered part of society, and therefore they do not become one. They are considered poor and unfortunate, miserable and deprived, and only truly sincere and professional charitable foundations are struggling with their socialization, trying to restore their motivation to live, strive for something and achieve their goals, fill them with faith in own forces and make them into families.

“Well, everyone helps as best they can,” they often answer me offendedly at the mention of professional funds. No, no, I'm not at all against a little help, and I know for sure that EVERYONE can help. But this is not about helping. I am writing all this just to explain - gifts to orphanages for the holidays and without them, as well as a bunch of fun activities for the holidays - this is not help, this is harm.

I will give an example from own practice when many years ago I came as part of a group of volunteers to one of the orphanages in the Tver region. We agreed on a visit in advance, prepared competitions and performances, clarified with the director that there would be no one except us that day. When we arrived, another group of volunteers left right in front of us, and the children, stretching, left the assembly hall with gifts. They hoped to go about their business, but the director told them to urgently go back to the hall, because "sponsors arrived", and the children wandered off to watch our next songs and dances, which they absolutely did not need. What benefit did we bring them by forcing them to sit in the assembly hall for half a day? What benefits can be brought by a master class on weaving baubles and soap making?

Well, what then to do and how to help, if there is such a desire?

I promised a positive at the end, and here it is - you may not only be needed, but very needed! For example, if you want to have a truly festive event, then organize it for children with disabilities. And try to take them somewhere out of the house, in our country they are so rarely given such an opportunity. And even better - consult with specialized funds and organize joint event for ordinary children and children with disabilities. This will be very helpful for both.

If you definitely want to give someone a gift, that is, children with cancer, there are children from low-income families, and just those who are on long-term treatment in the hospital, you definitely won’t spoil them. There are also elderly people, people in hospices and hospitals, paralyzed people, prisoners (everyone forgets about them) - they will all be happy with your warmth and attention, they will need your gifts and will be gratefully accepted.

Well, if you want to do something specifically for children from orphanages, then my advice to you is to donate money or become a volunteer in one of the funds that really change their lives and save them:

"Change One Life"- they find a father and mother for children, and there is nothing more precious than this gift.

One of the oldest and most professional foundations dealing with the socialization of orphans.

"Volunteers to help orphans"- they strive to keep as many children as possible in the family and prevent them from falling into orphanages, and also take care of the smallest refuseniks from zero to four years old.

"Big change"- systematic tutoring and development of orphans, they help them enter universities, find themselves in life, gain independence and independence.

With the money that is spent annually on teddy bears for children living in concentration camps, these funds can really save them, get them out of there, protect them, take care of them.

Everything that I have described in this article is far from new, and any expert in the field of philanthropy will tell you exactly the same thing. Many companies and kind people have already understood this and are beginning to abandon the system of giving gifts and entertainment to orphanages, and this cannot but rejoice.

Nevertheless, finishing the article, I also sadly look into the eyes of its readers, because most of them will agree with it closer to the beginning of the new year, when they return from orphanages, leaving another dose of gifts there ... "

The volunteer movement in Russia is gaining strength and developing, but at the same time it has deep historical roots. 2018 was the year of volunteers and volunteers in Russia. This activity is acquiring various directions, covering more and more needy people.

Social volunteering - orphanages

One of the areas of volunteer activity is visiting and helping to work with pupils in orphanages. It's a special kind social activities which is not suitable for everyone. Volunteers' wards in this case receive only basic care - supervision, food. They need love, affection, attention, care. Employees of social institutions do not have enough time and energy for this.

Volunteering has always been associated with mercy, helping the weak and vulnerable members of our society, for example, children who, for some reason, were left without parents. It is pleasant to work with children, but it takes a lot of moral and physical strength. Not everyone is able to constantly see the mental suffering of children.

Features of volunteer work in the orphanage

Every volunteer who wants to work in an orphanage needs to have an idea of ​​what awaits him. Children from social institutions will be significantly different from their peers from ordinary families.

Difficulties you may encounter:

• lagging intellectual, psychological, emotional development;
• lack of trust in others;
• self-doubt;
• aggressive behavior towards volunteers;
• desire to manipulate adults;
• theft;
• moral problems - a child from an orphanage most of all wants to be in a family, he will ask to pick him up. You need to be morally stable in order not to give empty promises, the volunteers themselves should treat such requests in a balanced way.

A volunteer who comes to an orphanage must have stable moral principles. He comes as an older friend, no need to take on other extraneous functions.

Why volunteers are useful

Employees of children's social institutions are responsible for looking after children. The development of the emotional sphere gets the residual principle, volunteers can help here. The child, abandoned by the parents, lives in the hospital for 1 month, then he is transferred to the baby house. He stays there until he is 3 years old. Then he goes to an orphanage, where he lives until the age of 18.

It is important to hold children at the smallest age in your arms. Tactile contact is needed for the formation of the psyche in children, proper development. Infant homes are often understaffed. Children need constant care and it turns out that nannies do not have time to walk with the kids. Volunteers help carry babies for walks, take them for procedures, vaccinations, medical examinations, transport and sort donated items, toys, and hygiene products.

Orphanages in Moscow, St. Petersburg, and many large cities are well provided with everything necessary. Volunteers come to visit the children in order to teach something, broaden their horizons. Valuable for children from social institutions are practical knowledge that will be useful to them in adulthood. In an ordinary family, parents teach such skills. Volunteers can help children from orphanages.

Children from the orphanage often confuse which food is stored in the refrigerator and which is in the cupboard, because the food is laid out for them by the cooks in the kitchen. Lack of basic household skills leads to great stress. Watching movies together, listening to music, doing needlework, physical education, sports games - all this helps to gain new skills, forms a taste.

When visiting orphanages, certain rules must be observed. They will help to maintain good relations with the pupils of social institutions, to save volunteers their peace of mind.

Helpful Hints:

• Don't talk about your parents, don't ask about your family. This sore subject should be banned.
• You can not call children orphans, many parents are alive, the children know about it. It is best to address by name.
• Don't make empty promises. It is easier to get used to rejection than to wait and hope that will undermine faith in a person.
• Learn to say the word "no". Pupils know how to achieve relationships, it is difficult for them to refuse. It is important to be able to set limits in communication.
• Do not treat children from social institutions with pity. Such thoughts will surely be embodied in actions, phrases that will hurt pupils painfully and lower their self-esteem.
• You need to be natural, small children still do not understand that something is wrong in their life, because they have not seen anything else.

When deciding to become a volunteer, visit orphanages, you need to calculate your time for regular visits to such institutions. You can come not every week, only 2-3 times a month, but constantly. It is important for children to systematically see a person, wait and meet him. The strength of human relations will allow in adulthood not to get lost, to be able to find friends.

How to become a volunteer

The decision to become a volunteer, to help abandoned children, should be made calmly and carefully. All your capabilities need to be evaluated, because you have to spend time and money on travel.

To become a volunteer, you need to apply to a non-profit organization. There are many of them in Russia, for example, “Change one life”, “Hope”, “Childhood house”, “Volunteers for children”, “The future is now”. You can contact via the Internet. There are forms to fill out on the official website. You need to be prepared that the organizers will need to find out some aspects of the personality of the future volunteer, his motives for engaging in such activities. You can indicate your education, work experience, skills and abilities that will be useful in communicating with pupils.

Volunteers are taken by persons who have reached the age of majority, that is, they can be responsible for their actions. Some organizations sign contracts. It has more psychological than legal significance. A person should be responsible and serious about the chosen case. People in the volunteer organization hope for him, the pupils of the orphanage will be waiting for him.

Volunteer movements often organize meetings for volunteer candidates. At them you can meet with leaders, experienced volunteers, ask questions. If a person is accepted into the ranks of volunteers, he is informed, but he is not immediately allowed to participate in work in serious organizations.

Preliminary work is carried out with new volunteers. They are invited to trainings, briefings. Volunteers should get basic knowledge of psychology, pedagogy, get acquainted with the intricacies of working with orphans. In contact with people, especially with children, there is always the possibility of force majeure situations. You have to get out of them with dignity. It depends on how the volunteer was prepared.

Next, the newcomer receives a list of events taking place in the near future. He determines the cases in which he will participate. Volunteers working with children may need medical certificates confirming the absence of certain diseases, such as tuberculosis.

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A Christmas tree and a mischievous cat - how to avoid a pogrom? Everything glitters, rustles and shimmers. The cat, as a curious creature, will inevitably be interested in all the decorations that will be on new year holidays in your house. And if the game with a Christmas ball does not look so dangerous, then eating rain and any other attributes of the New Year can lead to irreversible consequences.

A Christmas tree and a mischievous cat - how to secure a Christmas tree and avoid a pogrom?

The first thing to do in order to secure this holiday for your pet is to carefully choose decorations. It is better to buy Christmas tree balls from plastic, as they are more difficult to break, and it is better to replace the rain with paper serpentine, even if it is eaten, it will not damage the mucous membrane of the cat's esophagus.

The festive tree itself must stand firmly, otherwise it risks being overturned, and such cases are not uncommon, as cats try to climb on it. Electric garlands can be no less dangerous. Therefore, do not leave the cat alone with the lights on.

If you have a fluffy pet at home, for example, then the tree is most likely doomed. Cats will not only knock over the Christmas tree, but also break all the toys on it, as well as steal and eat some of the tinsel and other decorations. Avoiding such a situation is very important, but difficult. The following rules will help you solve this problem.

It is important to choose the right tree. You can buy a real one, or you can buy an artificial one. The real one is definitely more dangerous.

• Firstly, its sharp needles can damage the cat's skin;
• secondly, if the cat decides to chew on the branches, it can get poisoned.

It is very important to think carefully about the following questions:

1. Choice of sizes. The smaller the tree, the safer. Together with the Christmas tree, you need to decide what kind of filler (sand or water) will be. He needs to be well looked after. A cat can shit in the sand, and water can drink, because of which it will again receive a shipment.

2. The stand must be very strong and reliable. The safety of not only cats, but also children, if any, depends on this. It is also important to provide additional support to the tree from the walls and ceiling.

3. You need to place it in the safest place. There should not be any cabinets and foreign objects around the Christmas tree that will make the cat try to jump from there. If possible, then at night it is worth closing the door to the cherished room so that the cat does not climb the tree unattended.

4. You need to decorate it in last days. Firstly, the cat will have time to get used to the Christmas tree. Secondly, you do not have to be afraid for broken toys.

5. When it's time to decorate, you need to remove the cat away. He will imagine hanging toys as a normal game in which he has to catch or knock down shiny balls.

In no case should you tease the cat with toys that will be on the Christmas tree in the future!

It is worth approaching the choice of jewelry as seriously as possible. Some will have to be abandoned altogether.

Here are some important tips:

• Rain is very dangerous for cats, so it will have to be excluded from the list forever.
• Artificial snow is highly toxic and can kill a cat. Therefore, it will have to be deleted.
• You can’t put real candles on the tree, because the cat can hit it, which will cause it to fall and start a fire.
• No need to hang toys on the Christmas tree that were with food or just have a pleasant smell.

7. The most fragile and expensive toys should be at the top of the Christmas tree. It might save them. As a rule, cats manage to climb only to the middle of the Christmas tree, after which they are either driven away, or they start knocking down toys already there.

8. Jewelry must be fastened very tightly. Instead of threads, it is better to use clothespin holders. They are harder to hit.

9. A garland is the most dangerous thing for a cat. All wires must be hidden and protected. There is a high probability that the cat will want to chew on them, but this will not lead to good.

10. As an additional security measure, you can use lemon and orange peels that will scare away the cat. Just put them under the tree.

If you follow these simple rules, then there should be no problems with a furry friend and a Christmas tree. If the cat still climbs to the tree, then the spray gun can seriously help out the owners, even if only temporarily.

Do not forget that the New Year should give pleasant emotions. Therefore, if the Christmas tree was overturned, you do not need to be angry with your pet.

Christmas tree and cats

Keep a close eye on your cat's health. If you still didn’t watch it, and she feasted on Christmas tree decorations, then you need to urgently take her to the veterinarian.

Here are some signs that may warrant a visit to the clinic:

• The cat breathes with an open mouth.
• increased salivation;
• difficult bowel movements (constipation);
• swollen or hard to the touch belly;
• the cat does not allow touching the stomach due to pain;
• the mucosa near the oral cavity took on an unusual color.

And the most important sign: you have witnessed the swallowing of jewelry. Immediately after this, pour a tablespoon of vaseline oil into the cat's mouth and urgently take it to the doctor.

The New Year's table, which is replete with a variety of dishes, can also be unsafe for a cat. Do not be afraid to forbid guests not to give the pet food from the table, the health of the cat is more important. If you doubt that all your friends have an iron psyche, and someone can not resist the charm of a cunning face, then put a plate with the cat's favorite treat on the table and allow it to be treated only on condition that the food will be from this bowl.

Also, do not forget to lock the room with the festive table when leaving for a walk so that your pet does not make his way to food that is harmful to him.

Among other things, a cat can adapt to strong drinks and lick the glass in the literal sense to the point of intoxication. And this can cause serious poisoning, so do not expose your pet to danger.

To take care of mental state your cat, make sure that guests do not bother her much, especially if your pet does not tolerate strangers. You can also move her tray and bowl to a separate room and lock her there, then the noisy company will definitely not hurt, and the cat will be able to relax.

Concerning loud sounds, then cats rarely bother them, but there are those who panic from firecrackers rattling outside the window and other lighting effects. So that the cat is not afraid so much, you can leave it in a room with curtains hung and where there is a place to hide (an open closet, a house, etc.).

And if your pet climbed into a secluded corner, then do not pull it out by force. He decides when to leave. You can give a sedative, but only the one prescribed by the veterinarian. Sedatives for people on animals give a completely different, even opposite, effect.

Animals, being in a strong stress, often tend to leave the situation, which seems dangerous to them. And when the house is full of people, they constantly open the windows to ventilate the room or go in and out of the apartment, which gives the cat many escape routes. And you may not even notice it, because everything will happen very quickly. So be careful.